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Y(Our) Thoughts

The Nausea of the Patriarchy

10/24/2017

1 Comment

 
Barons of Suburbia take another piece of my good graces
I'm in my war you're in yours
Do we fight for peace as they take another piece of us.
  • Tori Amos, The Barons of Suburbia from The Beekeeper (2005)
 
That ole patriarchy.  So much nausea.  From Bill O’Reilly being “mad at God” about his own narcissism, to our president who epitomizes the same funhouse mirrors of egomaniacal projection, from the Catholic Church’s complicity in hiding sexual predators to the recent wave of sexual harassment uncovering.  So much nausea.
 
My mom did not raise me as THAT kind of male.  From Halliburton-esque military contracts and $1 million toilets to the feeble, mentally ill males killing innocents with rifles, when will we confront our nation’s true epidemic:  toxic masculinity.  When?  So much nausea.
 
What is toxic masculinity?  Is it the braggadocio machismo bravado braggart stereotype of Big Trucks and Napoleon complexes of boy-men with inferiority complexes?  Or do we need to see below our stereotypes?  Maybe we’ll ignore the pandemic of father absence and once more blame the mothers?  Nausea.
 
Just yesterday:  https://www.theatlantic.com/entertainment/archive/2017/10/what-if-women-had-the-power/543135/
 
First thought:  YES.  Second thought:  FINALLY.  Third thought:  Who will read this?  Fourth thought:  Which MEN will read this?
 
Tori Amos’ song ends…
 
I am piecing a potion
To combat your poison
She is risen
She is risen
Boys
I said she is risen
 
If these lyrics bother you – find a therapist.  If you get angry by this post – time to pray or meditate.  We see through your adolescence and it’s your turn on the boat, this nausea is no longer welcome here…
 




​
One final word.  Anger is always a surface emotion, there is always loss or a deeper hurt needing recognition.
 
“I hold my face in my two hands
No, I am not crying.
I hold my face in my two hands
To keep my loneliness warm –
Two hands protecting
Two hands nourishing,
Two hands preventing
My soul from leaving me
In anger.

  • Thich Nhat Hanh
1 Comment
Brian
10/28/2017 06:27:48 am

This is a lot to think about and digest intellectually, systematically and personally. Thanks for challenging me and others who read this to bring the “male box” to our consciousness.
Respect

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    Bryant Kusy, LCPC, a fearless mentor and therapist who, through his trauma and attachment based trainings, strives to re-member our Virtue.

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